I used to live vicariously thru the characters I played.
Sally’s, Dorothy’s, Beth’s, even Emma’s lives were more exciting, dramatic than my own could ever be.
Since “Cabaret” in 2011 with PAN Productions (pic below) I somewhat developed the idea that method acting was inevitable for me to truly get into the skin of the actor. I was Method without realising it, till life started to imitate art.
At first it was a glorious, a kind of voyeuristic way of living, rascal-ing thru devious thoughts, breath, words, and back-histories as I would never do in everyday life, and then Life started to pale in comparison.
I began to notice that I would be living for my next role; the next skin to inhabit in order to get on that roller coaster again and escape the insufferable mundane. The in-between periods often painful and limbo-like. I’m probably being too dramatic, but it didn’t do me any good.
After working on creating the role of Marilyn Monroe in “Marilyn & Me” in 2015, and really feeling that at times it wouldn’t be me speaking but an essence of her, and displaying erratic behaviour identical to the tragic screen goddess, I began to question whether this was ever going to be healthy for my mind, or if I would ever be able to achieve the great depths of Acting and actually live an amazing life outside of it, my real Life better than my onstage lives.
Having just completed 6 weeks at East 15 Acting School, I can breathe a sign of relief and say very confidently – YES.
Stanislavski’s later work focused on Physical Action rather than Emotional Sense Memory, coupled with intense Movement classes from the Grotowski tradition and cutting edge work researched and taught by Christina Gutekunst (book:”Voice into Acting”) & Christina Kapadocha (PHD: Somatic Acting Technique), and these last 2 weeks going thru Metre + Meaning + Body + First Folio work in breaking down the Shakespeare texts – and seeing how working the techniques into the body and PLAYING THE ACTION, NOT THE EMOTION has all resulted in brilliant moments in class so far, I am Elated!
I no longer need to emotionally wreck myself to try to understand and live truthfully thru my character. I no longer need to firsthand “know what it feels like” in order to
I’m learning to TRUST that I am enough, that I am a wellspring of inspiration, and thru the guidance of these leading edge acting coaches and techniques I can start to build an amazing practice which will lead me to greater endurance and enjoyment in just being an Actor! Hello LONG CAREER! And having a super f***king awesome Life separate of the onstage drama! #omfg
I’m definitely at the top of mining a huge dramatic bitcoin here, so stay with me as I unravel more thru this incredible journey.
Even if it’s been said before, it can always be said again
I’m here in London because all of you got me here! My #SendStephtoUKcrowdfunding initiative to support my East 15 Acting School Masters postgraduate degree this October has been hugely successful in raising the initials funds needed to begin. I’m super grateful & will keep you all updated. Stay tuned!